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Banned topic 1 - politics

26 May 2005

Look out - I am about to swear which I don't do on this blog very often. I am quite fired up.

I am often getting told to shut up at parties. Most of my friends would rather give birth to a chair than have a good table thumping political debate. Oh how I wish I was one of them. Don't get me wrong, I can ramble on about this winter's new black, who Tom Cruise may be seeing right now, whether the poncho makes the arse look smaller or bigger (answer is bigger), whose got fake boobs etc etc etc. but sometimes I look at the news or read the paper and I just want to SCREAM!!! and ram my opinion down the throat of anyone within earshot.

Sometimes I just cannot contaim my opinion, no matter how inappropriate the setting may be. Predictably enough this trait has had in the past remarkable man-repelling effects. Lucky for you, the company here is mostly silent (if indeed it exists at all), enabling me to rant unhindered by people shifting uncomfortably in their seats, rolling their eyes or refilling my glass in the vain hope that I may move on to a more appropriate topic - the weather perchance, or even Big Brother evictees and their outfits.

So here goes:

Most of the time I love being an Australian. I like the egalitarian society, the laid back lifestyle, the free-flowing booze and the hot summer beach days, the barbeques and even the footy. I like the relatively safe communities, the anti-gun sentiment, the two tiered political system, the compulsory voting and so on.

But I hate hate hate hate hate with a passion this bullshit. More than 60 children in mandatory detention? Some of them unaccompanied? Three year old girls banging their heads on walls with depression? And all in the name of national security? Because they didn't apply through the appropriate channels? I mean how could they actually do that?

Like this?

Asylum Seeker: "Hi, Evil Dictator. I am a defiant member of an organisation that seeks the right to free speech and women's equality in your country. I understand the punishment for this sort of activity is torture of me and family members, possibly even death. Many people have disappeared without explanation for trying to fight for justice in this country, but perhaps I've said too much. Would you mind awfully if you issued me with a passport because I would like to apply to the Australian Embassy for Asylum - and when I get there I intend to expose you and your corrupt government through the international media. Oh, and by the way, could I also take my pregnant wife and my two other children with me?"

Evil Dictator: "Of course, my friend. Just let me check that your paperwork is in order. Fee? No, no, be my guest - and throw another shrimp on the barbie for me when you get there eh?".

No, I don't think so.

Immigration policy is one thing. Indefinite mandatory detention of unaccompanied children (or anyone for that matter) in conditions worse than our prisons is a national disgrace.

And if you don't agree with me you can piss off.

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