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Name: knitabulous
Location: Mt Keira, New South Wales, Australia

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The three mysteries

8 Oct 2005

Mystery One : Pub karaoke brings out hidden personalities.

On Thursday I went on a girl's night out with my work colleagues. Oh, yes, I'm back at work two days a week. Anyhow, we had dinner in the local tapas bar (aoili you are akin to dairy fat in my esteem) and then headed off to the seediest bar in town for a drink. This bar has karaoke four nights a week.

One of my friends is what I would call a trigger drinker. It is like an allergy. Two glasses of wine and her personality is amplified - she becomes one attention-seeking superstar hell bent on milking the most outrageous experience from the most benign of situations. Now I know she reads this so this sentence is just for her - be advised my friend that I think this part of you only makes you more fabulous. I can see that this behaviour comes from her inability to accept mediocrity in any form - something which she disguises most of the time. And that is what makes her truly fabulous.

Another of the girls from work is by her own admission, the reserved quiet type. I wouldn't say she was shy - but I would say she was an introvert. She is happy to be in company without needing to be the centre of attention - she has a lot to contribute and is not shy about doing so, but all in all she is a good listener and impeccably mannered.

So, I can explain why Paris* gyrated like a pole dancer to a small and very very unreceptive crowd (except us who did the whoo whoo appropriately and applauded much) to 'Fat Bottomed Girls' at 10:30pm.

But where did that sultry version of Britney Spears' 'hit me baby one more time' come from dear Nicole*?? What else have you got hiding under that meek exterior???

* Names have been changed to protect the anonymity of the subjects.

Mystery two: Where have all the angry young men gone?

Australian Idol has 4 guys left.
Guy One: a babyfaced Greek boy singing to his mum.

Guy 2: is the hot guy next door who you tried to pash once but he ended up giving you a platonic lift to high school every day and giving you lovelife advice and rescuing you from unwanted attention from guys in nightclubs - the boy friend.

Guy 3: has long dreadlocks but a speaking voice like Michael Jackson and is a hippy peace love and understanding type of guy.

Guy 4: He's a punk rocker with hair full of tropical fish. (The hair colour not actually fish). Yay!! punk's not dead!! Go go LEE!! Oh no. No. Anything but this. Lee sings Greenday's Holiday and afterwards admits with a giggle that he has no idea what the song is about. "I'm not a very political person, unfortunately". Unfortunately Lee, you have no right to sing such a song or preted to be a punk rocker. I'm so sad Lee is so mindless. It has put me right off him.

Mystery three Why can't I finish any of my knitting??


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