Something for the yarn miss?

ME (to Watermelon Tourmaline Socks that Rock): Why are you being so petulant? What's the matter with you? Don't you want to be pomotomi?

Watermelon Tourmaline Socks that Rock (WTSTR): No. Shut up.

ME: Do you want to go back to the cupboard then?

WTSTR: No please, anything but the cupboard, I'm afraid of the dark. It's just, well, I 'm too pretty to be shoved into a boot.

ME: That you are my precious. You're only little though, there's not much I can do with a scant 100g of WTSTR. Do you mind if I rip you out?

WTSTR: Please do, this scaley pattern is so uncomfortable.

ME: What do you think would suit you the best, since you're so vain?

WTSTR: Garter stitch. Big needles. Modular.

ME: Well, that's against all my knitting principles, but for you I shall make an exception.

WTSTR: Thank you so much, I promise you won't be sorry. Plus, it will be over in two nights.

ME: Hmmm. I'm not convinced, but we shall see. Don't say I never do anything for you.