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Location: Mt Keira, New South Wales, Australia

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Big Food Day

2 Nov 2006

Today wasn’t a very big food day for me. By that I mean I hardly ate anything I actually felt like eating, I only ate what was available to me, and only really to fill a gap, and even though it staved away my hunger, it didn’t make me feel good.

Which brought me to thinking, why does some food make me feel good? Food is fuel. If food were only fuel and we ate only what we required to nourish us, do you think there would be any McDonalds? Any king sized chocolate bars? Giant packets of chips? Soft Drink?

Of course food is much, much more than that. To me, food can be a comfort, a pleasure, a guilty secret, a social activity, a cultural statement, a mood enhancer, a burden to cook in the evenings, or my mortal enemy. Is this a female thing? Do men have these strange and complicated ‘relationships’ with food?

I often tell myself I need to lose 10-15 kilos. I’ve been telling myself this for eight years. I could do it of course by reducing dietary fat intake and increasing fruit and vegetables, exercising more. Instead of course, I have manicures and pedicures, and wear too much makeup and obsess over my crow’s feet. Now that I am nearly 39 it is becoming a health issue also, not just an aesthetic issue – my heart would love me if I lost those extra centimetres around my tummy.

What would happen if I did lose weight, would it change my life? Would that voice in my head still sound the same? Would it make such a difference to how I feel about myself that I question my relationships? (believe me I’ve seen more than once the woman who loses 25 kilos and immediately leaves her husband). What would I look like? Would I be happier?

And, why don’t I just do it? What’s really stopping me? Is it fear of failure, or fear of success? It’s certainly not fear of hunger, but is it a fear on missing out on all those wonderful tastes? And, why does it feel like the taste of sacher-torte and roaring forties blue is somehow more ‘indulgent’ and ‘better’ than the taste of fresh tomatoes or crunchy lettuce – I like all of those things. If I did stop eating those naughty indulgent foods what would I miss out on – just the taste? What makes me over-eat
at certain times of the day? Does thinking about those foods in terms of ‘naughty’ or ‘indulgent’ make them more attractive?

If I had the answers to any of those questions I’d be a very successful weight loss counsellor. But first I’d have to lose 15 kilos.

Ah, food and me. Me and food. It’s complicated.

Is your relationship with food complicated?

Anyway, all that crap’s not really the point of what I wanted to say – it just kind of poured out of me.

All I originally planned on saying was: this is what I ate today vs what I would have liked to eat today….


What I would have liked:

Traditional Turkish breakfast like I had in Turkey in high summer; toasted baguette slices, unsalted butter, plain yogurt, honey, watermelon, fetta and olives. With strong skim flat white.

What I actually had:
Handful of jelly beans.
Two assorted cream biscuits.
Instant coffee with full fat milk.


What I would have liked:

Salad of mixed leaves and chicken livers with a brandy-based reduction dressing.
Icy cold beer.

What I actually had (gave me indigestion):
Hamburger from lunchroom – grilled beef burger, grilled onions, lettuce, tomato sauce, tomato slices and tinned beetroot on a toasted white roll with margarine.

Instant Coffee with full fat milk (that’s all there is in the work fridge).

What I would have liked:
BBQ mixed seafood.
Mango, coriander and vodka salsa.
Potatoes Anna.
Crisp Green Salad.
Crunchy Dinner Roll.
Unsalted Butter
Two (maybe three) big glasses of Sauvignon Blanc from the Marlborough in NZ

Stilton and Scottish oat cakes
De Bortylis Botrytis Semillon or similar sticky

What I actually had:
Leftover roast chicken legs and potatoes.
Microwaved steamfresh vegetables
Instant gravy

What I would have liked to have:
Black Tea

What I actually had:
Black Tea

Now, if any of that made you hungry, head on over to this guy’s blog. Made to make your mouth water, and he sounds like a dish himself too!

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